What Parents Do Wrong When They Forbid Certain Things From Their Children – Being Parents
All parents want to educate their children the best they can. However, sometimes forbidding certain things to children can harm them. Without wanting to, of course, and unconsciously.
We parents tend to forbid certain things from children, to protect them, educate them, correct them. However, sometimes these prohibitions limit the freedom as an individual and then we hinder the development of personality, self-knowledge, confidence and even autonomy of the little ones.
If you want to know what are the things parents are forbidding that they shouldn’t, then read on.
Limits and standards, yes; prohibit excessively from children, no
We all agree that standards and limits are necessary in the education of our children. It helps them bond with others and those around them in a healthy way. And it is also important for their safety and personal well-being.
Now, if there is one thing we should never do, it is forbidding certain things for children. But that’s what we do, for most of us. We forbid yelling, running, jumping, asking questions, crying and even sometimes staining! So here is a list of things that we should not forbid our children.
Things we should not forbid from children
Play like a child
If you remember certain moments from your childhood, many are probably related to playing in the mud, jumping in puddles, exploring in search of treasures …
So, why not let your child jump in puddles, get stained with mud, and explore? We’ll wash off the stains later, and ripped pants can easily be sewn back on.
The only thing we need to make sure is that the games take place in a safe environment. If you want to have a good time, why not play with them, even if you all end up spotted? Let out your childish side to have fun with your children.
Asking questions is one of the things we should not forbid from children
Sometimes our children’s continuous questions end up wearing us out. However, they do not do it to annoy us but to give answers to their concerns. They need to understand the world.
Therefore, instead of telling them “stop asking questions” or “don’t ask so many questions”, instead search with him for the answer in a book, an atlas or any other means that might help you. to clear up his doubts.
Speak out
We must not prevent children from expressing themselves, neither at home nor outside. We have already seen how our little ones can say something inappropriate in front of relatives or acquaintances and, because of this, we formally forbid them to speak in front of big people.
However, if you take away your child’s right to express himself, he will not be able to express his thoughts, emotions or ideas in the future.
They should be taught values such as respect and consideration for others. We also need to show them that sometimes we can hurt other people with our words. Accept your child’s views like anyone else’s.
Cry
If you forbid your child to cry, you are preventing him from expressing his emotions. However, as when he laughs when he is happy, it is totally normal for him to cry when he is sad.
Do not use phrases like “stop crying” or “cry is for…”. Instead, ask him what’s happening to him, so he can express his feelings and develop his emotional intelligence.
Being possessive with your toys
Why do we have to force children to share everything, anytime, anywhere? These are his toys. We must teach them the value of generosity and the importance of sharing, but not oblige them.
We must not take their toy away from them to leave it to another child because, in the end, they do not share: we only teach them that, when we want something, we can take it from another.
Be children
Children run, scream, jump and laugh loudly. They make a lot of noise, they make anger, they disobey and do stupid things. Ultimately, they have a lot of energy, they are curious, they explore, they discover, they make mistakes, they stain … All of this, of course, because they are children!
So we can’t force them to be quiet, to be still and still for an hour wherever we go, doing nothing. Their nature is that of vitality and movement.
So you have seen some things that parents do wrong by forbidding their children. Children are children and we cannot prevent them from being as they are because we have been there too.
These prohibitions ultimately affect their behavior, freedom, confidence, personality and autonomy. What if we try to avoid them?