The Problem Of Romantic Love In Teenage Couples – Parenthood

Today, romantic love in teenage couples is still very present, even though society is evolving in this area and becoming freer and more open.

The vision of love is formed over time, depending on lived experiences, messages conveyed by the immediate environment and characteristics of culture. So, today, many young people espouse certain traditional ideals of love, leading them to maintain toxic relationships.

Myths about it

Over the years, various myths about romantic love have developed. Many of them belong to medieval times, but they have been perpetuated to this day by media, movies, books, etc. Some of these myths are:

• Myth of the compatibility of love and abuse : believing that arguments and violence in a relationship are normal. It is very related to the classic phrase: “ who loves well chastises well “.
• Jealousy Myth : Believing that jealousy is a fundamental part of love, a sign of true love.

• Myth of the delicate princess and the courageous prince : Traditional tales tell the story of a courageous prince who saves and conquers a gentle and delicate princess. In this way, the image of the man as a hero and of the woman as a helpless person who cannot stand on her own two feet is instilled.

• Myth of change for love : belief that an aggressive and violent person will change the way they are in the relationship. This ideal leads girls above all to endure certain intolerable attitudes from their partners, because they think it is only a matter of time before they change.
• Myth that there is only one love in life : the idea that there is only one love in life, which cannot be let slip.
• Half or soul mate myth : The belief that everyone has a person to complement them. So, throughout our life, we try to find the perfect partner.

The problem of romantic love in teenage couples

Traditional ideals and myths of romantic love contribute to the formation of unequal and unhealthy couples. It is particularly dangerous in adolescence, because the first relationships and experiences of love are created. These relationships are determined by social and cultural influences which often associate the idea of ​​love with effort, suffering and pain.

All of this makes young people prone to being abusers and victims of gender violence, as they may have difficulty identifying toxic behavior and therefore tolerating inappropriate behavior.

But there are also other risk factors that can lead to gender-based violence in adolescents:

• Experiences of violence within the family.
• Having friends who have violent relationships with their partner.
• Have low self-esteem, both for the victim and the abuser.
• Have little social skills and a low level of empathy from the abuser.

In this sense, it should be kept in mind that the first experiences of love are fundamental for the development of future relationships. We must therefore be alert to any inappropriate behaviors that adolescents may have with their partners, correct them and help them establish healthy and balanced relationships.