My Friends Don’t Like My Partner, What Can I Do? – Being Parents
You have met a person and you have started a relationship. Sooner or later, now is the time to introduce your new partner to your circle of trust . It is an essential step to strengthen the bond.
However, when the time comes and things don’t turn out the way you thought they would, a worry echoes in your head: “My friends don’t like my partner… what now?”
If they are old friends and have a lot of trust, they will tell you bluntly. If they don’t know how to express it, they will demonstrate it somehow. For this reason, it is important to take the time to meet and give them the opportunity to express their concerns out loud, always with respect.
My friends don’t like my partner: how do I approach the problem?
Before talking with your friends , it would be good to answer some questions. For example: what do my friends mean to me? What did they think of my other companions? What will be the reason my friends dislike my partner? Does my partner know about it? What does he think?
Sometimes friends are like sisters. This is not necessarily positive if we see the family as a place of restriction or oppression of freedoms. And when the circle of friends is formed as a kind of clan, the arrival of someone new has to go through many tests to be approved.
However, do you think this is the reason why your friends don’t feel any affinity for your partner? If so, you probably wouldn’t mind. It is clear that it is impossible to please everyone or fit in with all groups.
If you are a couple and this person makes you feel good about yourself, the rest might just be a matter of time.
Think about romantic love
There is something very important that every person should do when in a relationship: question their own concept of love. And especially the idea of romantic love.
The goal of questioning is to find a solid and realistic basis, capable of providing well-being. It helps to clear things up, get rid of outdated concepts, and leave idealizations behind. In other words, you can’t expect to build a real relationship on 21st century medieval ideas.
People who think that love is synonymous with emotional dependence, jealousy, humiliation, loss of individuality and self-love and suffering are wasting their time.
And do you like your partner?
If you identify with the “my friends don’t love my partner” dilemma, it is important that you seriously consider whether you love your partner. Remember that in any relationship, it is important that there is well-being.
And as far as your partner is concerned, if your answer to most of the following questions is yes for Part 2, maybe you should listen to your friends.
- Do you feel respected or is he critical of every decision you make?
- Does he love you as you are or does he live by finding “flaws” in you?
- Does he like that you have friends or does he want to spend 24 hours a day together?
- Do you laugh a lot or do you suffer more, are you bitter and cry next to him?
- Are you afraid that he will get angry and avoid confrontation?
- Does he like to think about important stages in his life or is he impulsive?
- Does he care about you, your needs, your time, your fears or does he slip away every time you ask for help?
Finally, find the balance between what your friends say and what you think, feel and experience with your partner. Do not invalidate the opinion of others, but do not get carried away by their every word.
In conclusion, talk to your friends, communicate with your partner, but above all, be honest with yourself.