Is It Okay To Let Kids Do Things On Their Own? – Being Parents

While it seems easy to let the kids do things on their own, in practice it is a bit more complicated. This is especially important for parents, as this decision involves spending time teaching and supervising the little ones when they are doing the activities.

However, with these suggestions, you will be able to help your children gain maturity and independence for the future.

Let children do things on their own according to their age

Some suggestions inspired by Montessori pedagogy can guide you to assign tasks or activities to your child according to his age.

However, keep in mind that each child has their own learning pace, which you must respect. That is to say that a child can carry out certain activities which, in theory, are made for children older or younger than him.

What determines the degree of learning of the little one? This aspect is conditioned by his motivation, his abilities, his desire to do things, the education of the parents, his knowledge and even the environment in which he develops and where he lives on a daily basis.

Children between 2 and 3 years old

Parents may think that at this age their children are still babies. However, the little ones have the ability to do some simple activities. For example, they can put away their toys, pick up their clothes, water the plants, eat on their own, and order their storybooks, among other things.

Children between 4 and 5 years old

During this stage, the child observes the behavior of adults, imitates them and acts according to the approval or punishment they receive. He is also able to be tidy and help pick up and put away his toys.

On the other hand, the child can put cutlery, plates and napkins on the table. He may also learn to take turns and share food and toys, or to undress and dress with the help of an adult, and may show interest in playing with other children.

Between 6 and 7 years old

At this age, the child may be tasked with performing simple household chores, such as cleaning up dust and tidying the table. You can also ask him to vacuum, tidy up his desk, prepare his bag for school and his clothes for the next day.

Note that, around the age of seven, the child can control himself and avoid certain accidents and can move very well to visit a neighbor or a member of the family.

In addition, he is now able to manage a little weekly pocket money and knows the difference between doing things right and doing them wrong by defying the prohibitions .

From 8 years old

At eight years old, children begin to be more independent. So, you have to let them do things on their own when they are that age.

Even if they still need to be watched, they better not notice it. You can give them some day-to-day responsibilities like making breakfast, sweeping, cleaning the floor, taking care of animals, and washing themselves.

Between 9 and 11 years old

At this point, the child becomes much more independent, and is generally more responsible and organized. He has his own criteria, makes decisions and is emphatic against adults. On the other hand, he happily accepts being rewarded for the tasks performed.

At the age of 12

At this stage of life, the little ones are more critical, especially towards parents and teachers. They no longer want to be treated like children.

Furthermore, friends and older siblings influence their behavior, and children demand more autonomy in their decisions.

How do you get children to do things on their own?

Little by little, let them take on responsibilities according to their age. Teaching them how to do things and being a role model helps this process in a positive way.

Trust them and their possibilities. Also, encourage them and reward their successes, even if they are small. Show them their mistakes in a positive way and teach them to view failures as learning experiences.

Does it affect the child if they are not allowed to do things on their own?

Indeed, not letting children do things alone is bad for their maturation, because by doing this we impose an obstacle on them so that they assume their responsibilities and develop their autonomy.

This prevents them from having a sense of initiative, from making decisions and from facing difficulties in a positive way. They are therefore more prone to have low self-esteem.

We therefore conclude that it is best to let children do things on their own under the supervision of parents or responsible adults.   Also, always keep in mind their age and possibilities.